China airline pilots warned to cut out gambling, drinking and whoring

china-airline-pilots-gambling-drinking-whoringAsian countries are apparently bracing themselves for next week’s Lunar New Year celebrations and the corresponding uptick in gambling and debauchery.

As tens of millions of Chinese citizens head home for the holidays – believed to be the planet’s largest annual human migration – Chinese airline pilots have been told to quit enjoying themselves and keep their minds on their work.

In an open letter published Wednesday on an aviation website, the China Airline Pilots Association warned their members to cut out the gambling, prostitutes, smuggling and drunk driving. (And, presumably, drunk flying prostitutes to Macau for some gambling).

The Association said “very few” of its members were super depraved but that the aforementioned forbidden fruits were the type of thing that “severely challenges legal and moral bottom lines.” (Although it does potentially offer you a form of immortality via your very own episode of airline disaster recreation show Mayday.)

Fun is also off limits in Cambodia’s capital Phnom Penh, where the authorities have issued their now standard reminder that gambling remains illegal for Cambodian citizens, regardless of what the calendar says. Foreigners are allowed to gamble at NagaWorld, the city’s only casino, but the property is off limits to Cambodian citizens, regardless of their ethnic ancestry.

The statement from Phnom Penh’s City Hall also took issue with another stereotypical Chinese way of celebrating the new year by banning “blowing up firecrackers and fireworks or anything causing an explosion on this occasion.” City Hall said it would take a dim view of anyone who “causes chaos or disorder in society” in this fashion.

City Hall even warned Chinese celebrants who might be planning to engage in the annual tradition of burning fake money not to get carried away and burn the damn house down. So no gambling, no fireworks and no time-worn traditions. Guess that just leaves armed insurrection, then. To the barricades!