This time tomorrow, much of the male sporting demographic of England will be making plans to return from work and get straight into bed. Before you ask there will be no funny business going on. Not in the slightest. Sleep, and only sleep. Why would anyone want to go to sleep on a Wednesday afternoon at six though? It gives you no time to go out and party, and is just plain stupid. That was until we mentioned England having their best chance in many years to win the Ashes, on Australian soil.
It hasn’t gone un-noticed by the bookmakers, most of whom have seen record money coming in favouring the touring party. Betfair have had another idea entirely.
After realizing that fans will need to stay up all night, they’ve teamed up with top barista Youri Vlag to offer super-strength coffee to anyone that wants it. Experts have warned anyone willing to resort to the extreme measure that no more than two cups every 24 hours should be ingested – it does contains the same caffeine content as three strong espressos after all.
Called “Full Length Coffee,” Andy Lulham of Betfair commented: “We wanted to ensure cricket fans can watch England take on the Australians in the Ashes live – as it should be – regardless of the time difference. The ‘Full Length’ blend will keep spectators wide-eyed so they will not miss a ball, but we cannot guarantee they will turn up for work on time the next day.”
How to get hold of it?
They’ll be handed out to London commuters tomorrow, and you can email firstname.lastname@example.org.