Banging Balls About the Box in the partypoker Grand Prix Tour

Banging Balls About the Box in the partypoker Grand Prix Tour

Partypoker and Dusk till Dawn have announced full details of their Grand Prix Tour with visitations to Old Trafford, Stamford Bridge, St James Park, Cardiff City Stadium and Elland Road on the cards.

It was a fantasy of mine to watch Manchester United banging balls about the box whilst I did likewise with any bird worthy of a good rubber legging.

Then poker came into my life. Nothing had hit the vein quite like poker – not football, not even sex. My fantasy had changed. Now I wanted to play online poker whilst getting my rocks off.

Banging Balls About the Box in the partypoker Grand Prix TourThen I aged.

Pee started to leak in my pants, grey pubes sprouted like errant strands of floss and my morning wood was infested with termites.

Today, I don’t have time for the sex. The thought of all that jovial jocularity makes me reach for the jump leads.

Nah…today I would much rather watch a good game of football whilst playing some online poker.

Poker and football go together like Keith Harris and Orville. Both games are equalizers, tailor-made for the working class; the artisans of factory outlets all over the UK with all the sophistication of a fish paste sandwich.

Rob Yong knows that. The Dusk till Dawn (DTD) owner sees the need in our eyes. He understands the degeneration of our art, our craving, and our lust for money. He feels our romance. He knows that the working class football and poker posse are creatures of perpetual resurrection.

This is why he created the partypoker Grand Prix Poker Tour. The International Stadiums Poker Tour (ISPT) event at Wembley sent some blood through his skinny jeans. What started out as a lukewarm dip soon turned into a blood boiling case of the bends.

Speaking back in February, Yong announced his plans for the greatest grass roots tour the UK had seen since Primal Scream played the Screamadelica album from: Movin’ On Up to Shine Like the Stars.

“To generate interest in poker at the grass roots level across the whole of the UK, we will be launching the partypoker Grand Prix Tour, planned to be a £50 buy-in with a £250,000 guarantee for each leg. 5,000 entries required “DTD size” venues and Gary Oakes is in discussion with various football stadiums.” Said Yong.

The boy Oakes did good. Five stadiums have bought into the idea. The tour begins on 9-11 October at Old Trafford Manchester, and will end in April at Elland Road in Leeds. Each event will feature a £70 buy-in £250,000 Guarantee Main Event, £330 High Roller and £70 Second Chance and £70 Six-Max Event.

The Grand Prix Poker Tour

Oct 2015 – Old Trafford, Manchester

Nov 2015 – Stamford Bridge, London

Dec 2015 – Online on partypoker

Jan 2016 – Cardiff City Stadium, Cardiff

Feb 2016 St James Park, Newcastle

Mar 2016 – Online on partypoker

Apr 2016 – Elland Road, Leeds

Another concept introduced in connection with the Grand Prix Tour is the Grand Prix Chip. Players can win these chips by competing in the 8pm DTD Mini online at partypoker. Players who win a $120 DTD Ticket in the DTD Mini will also receive a Grand Prix Chip for use in any Grand Prix Poker Tour Leg, whether buying in for cash or with the $120 DTD ticket.

If a player is fortunate enough to make the final table with a Grand Prix chip then they win a holiday of a lifetime. If a player wins a Grand Prix Poker Tour leg with a Grand Prix chip then they win a Porsche or cash equivalent.

If that seems like Yong has gone a bit mental with the issuance of such luxury goods then remember this is aimed at the grassroots of poker. Expect to see the winner demand a holiday for 12 in Minehead Butlins and a free bus pass for life.