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Footballer punished with continuous slumber party

TAGs: Andy Carroll, assault, bail, jail, Kevin Nolan, Newcastle United

CarrollIf you’re like me and don’t get at all surprised when footballers are reprimanded then the latest from Newcastle won’t phase you – I didn’t really even notice it. Though, look at the player in question’s bail conditions and that’s where it starts to get interesting.

The player in question is Newcastle United forward Andy Carroll who was either arrested for his past misdemeanor of thinking cornrows looked cool on a white Geordie or that he assaulted an ex-girlfriend. You fill in the blanks. The player turned up at the court hearing with hoody and jeans. Usual. Pleaded self-defence, and was then given bail. Still nothing that has made you jump out of your skin. That was before you heard the punchline to the court’s joke – he will have to live with his captain Kevin Nolan whilst on bail.

Given Carroll’s history of getting a little hot under the collar with fellow players, as Nolan it’s rather foolish to let him stay with you. Think of it akin to welcoming a kid into your house that’s been excluded from a number of schools for needless violence. Exactly. You get the picture.

The only question now is whether Mrs Nolan is going to be allowed to use corporal punishment against the two when they play up. Not if you want a Carroll knuckle sandwich between the eyes. Wa’hey!

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