WSOP: Modern Life is Not Rubbish

WSOP: Modern Life is Not Rubbish

Lee Davy pours out his frustration at the lack of technological advancement shown at the 46th Annual World Series of Poker in this opinion piece about lines.

WSOP: Modern Life is Not RubbishI cuddled up to my wife. She placed her head on my chest and told me to wake her up in 10-minutes. After half of the time had passed, I left the bedroom.

“Wake me up in five minutes,” she asked.

I returned fire: “set your alarm.”

My wife utters into her mobile phone: “wake me up in five minutes.”

“Alarm set for 10am.” Came the reply.

Our world is very different to the one that existed when Johnny Moss was voted as the best player at the 1970 World Series of Poker Main Event. We live in a time when anything is possible. The human race has the potential to create anything. Talking to our mobile phone is chicken feed.

“Mobile phones will be telling you how to kill your husband next.” I tell my wife after the five minutes grace has passed.

My wife talks to her phone again: “How do I kill my husband?”

Her mobile phone heads to the Internet and presents her with an article called: 33 Ways to Kill Your Husband.

Artificial Intelligence (AI) is progressing at a fast rate. My wife’s mobile phone is proof of that. Technological geniuses are even hiring philosophers to help autonomous programs such as Google’s self-drive car. Should a human being be faced with an ethical dilemma of crashing their car into an 80-year old man, or a lady pushing her pram, they will no doubt make the right choice (Sheldon Adelson override would be needed). Our machines need to learn the same thing.

The advancements are so pacey, and so serious, people like Elon Musk, Stephen Hawking and Bill Gates have been officially vocal about treading very carefully. Hawking believes AI will one day take over the world, and Musk has donated $100m of his own greenbacks to a think-tank created to minimize the potential for Terminator’s to take over the world.

But not every piece of machinery wants to bite your dick off and use it as a snowman’s nose. Technological advancements have made our lives so much easier. For some of us that means we have more time to focus on our life purpose, changing the world, and helping others. Then for some they have more time to play video games, and tug on their pencil or mushroom tipped thingamajig.

Take today as an example.

It’s my niece’s 18th birthday. She lives in the UK and I am in the US. I am able to send her a birthday greeting via text. I order her a book and it’s delivered and paid for with the click of a single button. I feel like a cheapskate. I send her a gift certificate as well. That took another click.

I talk to my backer about playing more events. He wires me the money. It’s there instantly. Unfortunately, it’s in sterling, and I need dollars. I speak to my friend, who is playing in the $3k, and he gives me $1,500 in tournament lammers, and I send him the equivalent exchange rate to his bank account.

Click…click…click.

I can walk into a grocery store in the UK, buy all of my goods, scan them, and pay for them, and I don’t have to interact with a single human being. If I wanted to I could place my order online, and I wouldn’t even have to leave the house. They would deliver to me.

I can eat in my favorite Mexican restaurant and I can pay the bill using my mobile phone. I can also use my mobile phone as a plane ticket, as a cinema ticket, as a remote to control my heating back home, and as my wife discovered this morning – for finding 33 ways to kill me.

But not everyone has embraced technology.

I want to register for the $1,500 Extended Play No-Limit Hold’em event on Saturday. The only option I have is to get dressed, hail a cab, ride to the Rio, stand in line, get annoyed, register, hail another cab, and return to my condo. It’s a waste of time. It increases my stress levels. It makes me want to ask my mobile phone for advice on how to kill the WSOP.

In an age where Elon Musk is worried that machines will overtake the earth, and we are able to grow artificial limbs, one would imagine that we would be able to register for a poker tournament without having to stand in line.

The lack of movement on this issue is not due to cost. By improving the system, cost can actually be saved, and customers gain more value. Voila. So why not allow me to log on to WSOP.com, and register for the event. I have the capability of forwarding you any details that you need via my phone. I can then wire you the money electronically, and without exorbitant charges levied at overseas customers.

Once I have registered, the WSOP can then send me a ticket. I can choose to print it out, or I can upload it onto my phone. When I turn up to the event I can show the dealer my phone, or ticket, and the accompanying identification. Once I have cashed I have two choices. I can stand in a ridiculously long line, or the WSOP can wire the money back from whence it came.

If this doesn’t happen by the time the 47th Annual WSOP begins, then I will find another use for my mobile phone.

I will throw it at someone’s head.