Lunatic shoots up Texas University

Today, a kid in a ski mask took an Ak-47 to the University of Texas and just started licking shots as if he was playing Halo on campus. He eventually turned the weapon on himself, but not before he sent the entire school into a frenzy. It was reminiscent of the 1966 melee, when troubled student Charles Whitman shot and killed 14 people and injured more than 30 from the observation deck of UT’s iconic tower.

What’s with the kids these days? Columbine, Virginia Tech, it’s becoming far too common. It used to be that if a kid was one screwdriver short of a toolbox, he simply cut himself with exacto knives, sniffed white out on the reg, and maybe took to the streets to become a serial killer or joined a cult. These days, is seems the cool thing to do when you’re a loony toon is to grab a gun and head to school to shoot up the place. It’s puzzling why these types of acts of violence typically occur in affluent societies. Perhaps it’s the individual’s way of taking out his anger and frustration with the world, on the society he knows best? Who really knows. And who really knows what goes on in the homes of these kids? At what point does some responsibility for your child being a masked murderer fall on the parents?

Either way you look at it, it just doesn’t make any sense. Isn’t it time that schools of higher learning instituted metal detectors at the doors? It sounds terrible and it shouldn’t have to come to this, but there’s just too many crazies out there. Soon, school supplies will consist of books, tuition, housing and a Kevlar vest.