Social Media Conspiracy Theory

TAGs: Pentagon, Social Media

dollarbilleyeWhen I heard that the Pentagon had relented on its previous stance and was going to allow troops to use social media to communicate with family and friends it confirmed for me what a theory which I have believed all along. The Pentagon wasn’t willing to permit troops or officials to gamble or watch  pornography online, but it appears chatting and other forms of communication will be permitted. Read more.

I have all the respect in the world for those that risk their lives to protect the freedoms that we enjoy, and it’s a little disappointing that the Pentagon didn’t reward these brave men and women by allowing them the same freedom to gamble online if they damn well feel like it, if only to relieve a little stress.

But allowing communication from the front lines, to me, all this means is the conspiracy theory I have held deep in my heart since the inception of msn, hi5 and Facebook must be true. They’re watching and listening.

Many believe that this conspiracy theory that the government or the defense department is watching and monitoring online conversations is rubbish, and they’re entitled to their opinion. But I pose this question. Would the US army really take the chance that somehow military information could be transmitted online and end up in the wrong hands? I don’t fucking think so, not unless they could monitor it, and I believe they can and they are. If technology exists where a satellite camera could take a picture of you while you’re sitting on your toilet reading the newspaper, then this isn’t too far fetched.

So yes, that conversation you had on facebook with that bar slut from the other night, Uncle Sam knows all about it. Shit, that’s probably the way Tiger Woods got pinched, that and nailing dozens of ho’s. That webcam convo with the busty blond with double D’s that got you to take your pants off…yup..that’s in some data bank, available for use should the need ever arise. Call me crazy, call me paranoid, but the proof is in the pudding.

Even at the slight chance that sensitive information could be transmitted from a high risk at war area, you’d have to assume the Pentagon would be aware of it, every single word of it, they better be. I’ve seen enough episodes of 24 to know you can’t trust anyone, even if they appear to be the good guys, so if by some weird coincidence you use the words terrorist, Al Queda, nuclear weapons, or Osama Bin whatever, too many times in your Facebook or messenger or twitter messages, don’t be surprised to see a blue, unmarked cable van parked outside your pad, with sounds of the propellers from ghetto birds hovering over top. Just writing this probably has my ass on taps.


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