NFL lines up the Queen of Cougars for Super Bowl half-time show

Eric Bianchi
October 27, 2011
1 Comment
Madonna in Erotica

Yes that is Madonna

Madonna is being lined up to take the trodden path to…we’re not really sure where, by headlining the Super Bowl’s fabled half-time show. The 52-year-old got rather jealous when she heard Lady Gaga was being tapped up for the gig and didn’t want to pass up on the some 111million viewers in North America.

To be honest, we’re hardly surprised the NFL has gone back to the pool of 50-somethings. Half-time last year was like watching X-Factor mixed with bad karaoke and finished off with a dollop of humor (not the funny type). The Black Eyed Peas did their best to sound like a glorified covers band you find as a drunken night out takes a turn for the worst. By picking Madonna we can only presume commissioner Roger Goodell is reliving a time when he used to let his hair down. Yeah, we know it’s hard to believe.

It won’t be hard for Madonna to top last year’s effort or a number of the shows in previous years. She’ll find it a trifle harder to knock the Queen of half-time shows, Janet Jackson, off her perch. Lucky for Madonna, she has that extensive back-catalogue that many younger viewers will have been sheltered from.

Janet Jackson nipple tassle

Her competition...

If we were directing this show, playing a 15-minute compilation of Madonna’s best bits would be the best call to make. The sight of a provocative Madonna taking part in various sadomasochist bondage scenes: what a way to send a shockwave through Middle America!

If they’re going to bring one thing into the Super Bowl half-time show to accompany Madonna’s soft-core porn-fest then the Lingerie Bowl would be it. What better way to grab back some half-time audience share than trotting out a rowdy bunch of scantily clad hunnies. The bettors that wager the best part of $2billion on the game would be ecstatic. If not for the chance to bet on the winner, then purely for the copious amounts of flesh on show.

Chances of a “PR stunt” with Madonna are higher than with most over-50s and as cougars go there isn’t many that have had “it” for as long. Now don’t let us down Roger!

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Tags: Article, Madonna, NFL, Super Bowl
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  • Willy

    Hey! How about Britney Spears? Want to see Britney Spears. IMFAO