What NOT to do in Mexico

Mark McKenna
February 22, 2011
4 Comments

There aren’t a lot of things you can’t do in Mexico; in fact, you might even be tempted to believe that anything goes over there. Not true. With Spring Break quickly approaching, Mexico is going to turn into a hot bed for partying young and horny women, which means it’s time to start planning that Mexico trip with the guys right away. But before you make your plans to do anything and everything in Mexico, here are some things you just can’t do in Mexico.

1. Contrary to popular belief, you can’t urinate anywhere. This one caught me off guard too, but trust me, if you get busted it’s a great excuse for the Federales to fuck with you.

2. Do not try to score some drugs. Let’s just say it’s not a good time for that.

3. Do not miss the PlayBoy Club Casino in Cancun. You will regret this for the rest your life, or at least until next year.

4. Do not attempt to drink Tequila like a Mexican. Unless you are a drinking All Star, you don’t have that! Even if you are a rock star, like most gaming industry professionals are, you probably still don’t have that! All you are going to do is ruin the next day for yourself, unless you have the magical cure for the worst hangover ever.

5.Do not sleep with the locals. This one is optional. A word of caution though, local girls have fathers, brothers and cousins and friends that could kick your gringo ass if you screw them over.

6.Do not bring your own alcohol into the clubs. I know, it sounds obvious, but sometimes when you’re in Mexico it’s easy to think anything goes. It happened to me before… I was young and stupid, I was at Senior Frogs in Cancun, and it’s a mistake I will make only once.

When they bust you, they don’t just pour it out or kick you out, they lock you in a dark closet in the back of the club and poke you with blunt objects while they tell you just how badly you’ve fucked up…And you’re just sitting there, drunk out of your mind, thinking to yourself, “How did it end like this?” Hopefully, you’re lucky and you’ll have friends that will notice you’re missing and demand your release.

True story.

I think that’s about it, I’m pretty sure you’re allowed to just about everything else in Mexico.

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Tags: Article, mexico, Playboy Cancun Casino, spring break
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  • David

    And don't forget to bring lotsa condoms! Think of a safe fuck always.

  • gerard

    7. never stare at a cactus in the middle of the day ;-)

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