Punter’s week: Terry provides end of The Road
The human race is overrated
Good day to you. Matt Kuchar came extremely close to pocketing me a few squid last week. But no matter, the plaice return will do – two sentences, two fish jokes. What a start!
Saturday
And as if they weren’t bad enough I might as well add that yesterday’s bets really had me squ-eeling. After a promising time of it last week I decided to ramp it up a notch on the football front. In fact I ramped it up three notches, by giving it large with a canny three-fold.
Draws between Birmingham and Spurs and West Ham and Blackburn set up a nail-biting finale; the same outcome between Burnley and Chelsea would return over £2,000 and with seven minutes to go I was already thinking about how I was going to spend the money. But then John Terry ruined everything by staying true to form and scoring away from home again.
Sunday
Earlier in the week, I thought I had come to the end of the road. In fact I had – I’d just left the cinema after watching The Road and so with apocalypse in mind decided to get home and test my survival instincts in an online poker tournament on Sunday evening.
Then I realised I didn’t have the patience to hang around and so decided to find a sit ‘n’ go (rather than a sit ‘n’ stay), duly paid my $25 entry and looked forward to eating the fishes alive.
I have always found that the best way to win at Sit ‘n Gos is to raise as much as you can and never see a flop. So this was the tactic I adopted and, one blind at a time, put myself in the lead. It was very easy to dominate the table because, strangely, all the players were afraid to call any raises. I raised with everything from AA to 72 and when the table was reduced to three people, I eliminated one opponent even though he held a superior hand.
He had AK to my QJ (queen of diamonds). I was on the big blind and he raised four times the amount of the blind. I had him outchipped and I knew I was capable of overcoming the loss because of his proven inability to steal blinds. I also knew he’d probably go to the river if I had him beat, so I decided to see a flop, which came up KT6 (two diamonds).
I led out with a large bet. I figured I would try and take the pot right then and there. He only doubled my raise giving me about 4/1 on my call. I called him and turned the A diamonds. There was a possible flush out there and I held the nut flush draw with the made straight. I checked, knowing that he was going to commit hari kari on the hand. He moved all-in on the turn and I was presented with a no-brainer call. When we turned our hands over, and I saw what he had, his AK only had four outs in the entire deck.
If he had moved all-in on the flop, I would have folded. Instead he made a cheap bet I could call, and then bet all his chips when a bad card was drawn. He could not have played his hand worse. The chat box had been open throughout and for some reason he blurted out something that questioned my parentage. How I enjoy the human race.
Wednesday
In time-honoured tradition I have attacked the golf with gusto. I tend to shop around for the best bets of course but Stan James, who launched their new website last week, get a good deal of my business so good is their on-running service.
I’m on Rickie Fowler (wasn’t he in Eastenders?) at 33/1 and Schwartzel at 16s (Stan James) this week. Come on the transatlantic double! Retirement is only a weekend away.
I’ve also taken the peppering a little too far and have an army of golfers firing for me: Goosen (16s, Paddy Power), Quiros (25s, Ladbrokes), McDowell (50s, Boylesports), Villegas (40s, William Hill) are all playing the Qatar for me, while Stateside Fowler, Watney (50/1 with VCbet), Glover (25s, Paddy Power), Mahan (33s, Stan James) and Snedeker (40s, Stan James) all have it in their power to make me a rich man.
Thursday
In general, it was a quiet week on the gambling front as I was at the industry trade show in Earls Court for three days. I did, however, manage to blow £250 on a drunken visit to the Empire Casino in Trafalgar Square on Thursday and both my Aussie Open bets came a cropper.
In fact, my deepest regret is not backing Federer to win in Melbourne. He was priced at 11/4 with 888 at the start of the tournament and although we can all be wise after the event, those were incredible odds – not that Bettingchoice.co.uk thought so. My favourite line on their preview was “Federer carries an 11/4 outright price so there isn’t a huge amount of value on him unless he actually wins the final.”
So bets are actually no good unless you win them. You don’t say…
Running total after week 2: £93+
Added to the ante-post horseracing portfolio:
Co-ordinated Cut – The Derby 33/1
Twice Over – Dubai World Cup 7/1 – Come on Henry.
Already advised
Horseracing
Go Native – Champion Hurdle 8/1
Long Run – RSA 6/1
Twist Magic – Champion Chase 12/1
Captain Cee Bee – The Arkle 8/1
Poquelin – Ryanair Chase 6/1
Kauto Star – Gold Cup 11/8
Shinrock Paddy – Albert Bartlett Novices 12/1
Football bets
Chelsea – Premier League 6/4
Bordeaux – Champions League 33/1
Barcelona – Champions League 3/1
Cardiff – Championship 25/1
Aston Villa – FA Cup 9/1
Lionel Messi – Champions League Topscorer 9/1
Didier Drogba – Premier League Top Scorer 6/1
Snooker
Ding Junhui – World Championship 12/1
Stephen Maguire – World Championship 14/1
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