“Experts say this global warming is serious, and they are predicting now that by the year 2050, we will be out of party ice.”
Sounds like something I’d say, right? Especially with the holidays happening and New Year’s Eve just around the corner. (Come to think of it, an ice shortage at one of my parties would be pretty fucking disastrous.)
Sadly, that joke is all David Letterman.
Although I tend to joke about a lot of things (…next to really expensive vodka, I seriously believe that laughter is the best medicine)…I can’t say that I find any one thing about global warming particularly funny. When islands start disappearing along with our fish supplies…where’s the punch line?
We’ve obviously got a dead serious matter on our hands here. So when I read that the world’s superpowers were gathering at the 2009 United Nations Climate Change Conference on Dec. 7th-18th to lay down the groundwork for global change – a sudden splash of optimism trickled down my spine (oh no wait…that was the ice-cold vodka being poured down my back by one of my…oh never mind).
My point is this: the Copenhagen summit was the biggest environmental meeting ever held and the goal after two weeks of mind-numbing meetings was to seal a worldwide deal to head off dangerous global warming. This thing went on for two weeks. TWO WEEKS. Was anything decided? No.
The United States, China, India, Brazil and South America drafted an accord that didn’t include any concrete plans or solutions. Without pointing any fingers (China), let’s just say that while some countries (China) may be strong in the wind and solar industries, their (China) growth – as well as their political and economic dominance – has much to do with their (China) burning cheap coal.
You’re thinking, “Hey, doesn’t the United States burn a shit load of coal?”
Yes they do. Together, China and the U.S. have 44% of the world’s coal reserves and because it is so cheap and so reliable a power source, world coal use is expected to be used 50% more by 2030.
And cheap coal leaves one big mother-fucking carbon footprint.
How’s my carbon footprint, you ask? I’m working on it…I sold the jet in 2006 and live in the tropics in houses that have green design so they do not need air conditioning (except in bedrooms). I know I still have work to do, but what about the leadership gap here?
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